I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, did you? – Stephen King (from The Body…later turned into the film Stand By Me).
As a rule, I don’t gamble on 12U hockey. Aside from there being a dearth of sportsbooks who will accept a wager, the outcomes of youth sports are too unpredictable.
This is our first year of AA hockey, and first year joining the Hampton Road Whalers organization. My son plays on a major team, meaning all the kids on the 12U team are 12 years old, and by happenstance born in 2012. As the season begins, it’s a leap of faith to think that our team, based out of the Hampton Roads area, will be competitive with more northern based teams in Virginia, or even the broader northeast area of America and Canada.
In previous years I blogged game to game, this year I chose to write a journal, then edit the whole to paint a more complete picture of the season.
I hope you enjoy it.
Wilmington 14 – 15 September
The season begins with a four-hour road trip to Wilmington, North Carolina for a couple of non-league games. It’s one of two trips to the Carolinas we make this season. Last year Brendan played for the Virginia Beach Warriors and competed in the Carolina Hockey League (CHL). Every road game meant a trip south, as far as Columbus, South Carolina, and further included Greenville, and multiple trips to the Tri City area of Raleigh. Looking ahead to our schedule this year, most league away games are in the National Capital Region, and although the drive up Route 95 can be painful it’s generally shorter for our family this year.
When I travel, I tend to try to find a hometown, college, or military friend who lives in the area. By the time I turned 40, I learned that travelling is more about who you see than what you see. Wilmington is home to two hometown friends I grew up with dating back to first grade at Woodward Parkway Elementary School. One friend works at the rink, the other lives about 10 minutes away. We meet at the rink, then link up for dinner at the Buffalo Wild Wings adjacent to our hotel. I love the conversation, when you talk to people who you knew when you were 12, it keeps you grounded to who you are.
The Whalers pass their first test of the season and generally walk away from the rink feeling good about two victories. We have a scare in our second game when we blow a 4 goal lead. The team wakes up and scores a flurry of goals in the third period for a 10-6 win to match the 4-goal 7-3 win the previous day. Although seemingly decisive, temporarily losing a 4-goal lead leaves a mental scar, and throughout the remainder of the season we never truly feel comfortable with any lead. On the bright side, two years ago, Brendan and some of his Whaler teammates played the same team while in the Warriors uniform and lost decisively. So from Brendan’s perspective there was a semblance of payback, and a raised expectation on how the team will perform in the coming season. I am cautious. It’s 2025 and I still have a pre-conceived bias that the quality of hockey you watch is inversely related to how far south you travel.
First League Games 21 -22 September
Athletes understand that you must put the past behind you. Forget the losses, forget the wins The most important shift is the next shift and the most important game is the next game. The team had success in Wilmington but refocuses for our first league games against the Southern Maryland Buffalos. We take both games with a 5-4 and 4-1 victory. The first game is a bit too close, and most likely reflects a Whalers team not quite comfortable with its identity. This will rapidly change in the coming weeks when we travel for our first tournament and face what we perceive as tougher competition.
I don’t have much to comment on for this weekend of hockey as Jill took Brendan to the games while I took my daughter to her tennis matches in Virginia Beach. Balancing who takes what kid to what event can be challenging, and Jill and I have to make deliberate decisions to ensure one of us is not taking only one child to their events. Our kids play different sports throughout the year, and even if one of us has no background or knowledge of the game, it’s still important to attend. Further, I find that not being at some of Brendan’s hockey games is better for our relationship, as it gives Brendan the space to tell me the story if his games in lieu of me telling him what I saw, which of course will come off as criticism no matter how well intended.
Charleston
“Goaltenders form almost a secret society within the hockey world, so caught up in their own world that they have virtually created a second one for themselves” – Roy MacGregor
Our first exam occurs in Charleston South Carolina. From our home in Williamsburg, it’s a 8-hour drive, the first of many long drives any parent of a child who plays youth travel sports can relate to. Indeed, throughout the season our average drive is anywhere from 3-5 hours for away games and tournaments, to include the National Capital Region (in and around D.C.), Charleston, South Carolina, Hershey and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Rochester, New York, and Nashville, Tennessee.
Two years ago, I took my wife and kids to Charleston over Spring Break. The warm weather, the historic city, and the Charleston Open pulled us into making the trek South. We watched some of the best tennis players in the World compete, visited Fort Sumpter, and walked through the U.S.S. Yorktown. The hockey tournament on the other hand involved zero sightseeing leading me to the general theory that when travelling for youth hockey, the hotel could be adjacent to the Roman Coliseum, or the Pyramids of Giza, but the team would prefer to run the halls of the hotel in ultra-competitive games of knee hockey.
In his book The Captain Class, Sam Walker describes team chemistry as a team’s interpersonal dynamics that has an impact on its performance. Knee hockey provides the team an important ingredient for their future success. It’s early in the hockey season, and the kids are just getting to know each other. Similarly, I am still learning the names of other parents and aligning parents to their kids. Knee hockey in the conference room for the kids while parents have a drink and talk in the lobby help to establish team chemistry.
The Charleston tournament becomes our first real sign of success. The Whalers are in a pool of four AA teams, and win their pool play by defeating the same Wilmington team we played earlier in the month, a team from Texas, and a team from Seattle.
We win each game and generally dominate the flow of the game. We beat Wilmington for the third time in as many weeks, dominate the Texas team, and squeak by the Seattle team in a game where the score was closer than it should have been. The championship game is close, we win 5-4, but the puck spends most of its time inside our opponent’s blue line. Our goalie Avi seals the game with a spectacular save with about two minutes remaining. A Texas player sprung for a breakaway while down 5-4, the players shot was intercepted by Avi’s extended pads, and the Texas team doesn’t threaten again.
Avi makes the championship save
The closer score represented an aspect of competition that holds in all parts of life. The advantage tends to go to the side that learns the fastest. The Texas team observed the way our defense aggressively pressed the puck in their zone. This tactic is useful in slowing down opponent transitions, allowing forwards to recover and support the defense. It further helps keep the puck in the offensive zone, which is another form of effective defense. When the puck touched the stick of a Texas player at the half boards, a wing would fly down the ice behind our defense. This simple adjustment provided more clear paths to the net, and more offensive chances. The long stretch passes also helped to push the play into the Whaler end of the ice, an effective way to limit our scoring opportunities. This tactic closed the score, but the talent differential was too much to overcome, and I tend to give credit to that aspect of the game as the decisive part of our victory. But hats off to the Texas team for recognizing what they saw, and adjusting their game accordantly.
Following the game I take some team championship photos, each member of the team holding their medal in the air with one hand, and one finger up on the other. Over the course of this season and previous seasons I gradually turn into the team’s unofficial photographer. It’s a hobby I picked up in recent years, something I genially enjoy doing, but there is a selfish purpose behind it too.
The first trophy and medals of the season. Winning became a habit with this team.
Walking around the rink during the game snapping photos is how I deal with my internal anxiety while my kids play whatever youth sport they are playing. If I can focus on taking pictures of them and their teammates, then I don’t focus solely on my kids where I can have an awful habit of only seeing their mistakes.
Parent watching at youth sports events is entertainment all in its own. There are other parents like me who take photos or livestream the game. Dads cluster and Moms flock together, separating the sexes as if we were at the Western Wall or inside a puritan church. Some parents prefer to stand alone, while others stand in groups, the groupings tend to remain the same throughout the season. On occasion when the opportunity presents itself some parents flee to the warmth of the lobby and rink bar and restaurant. Parents of goalies (usually the dad) can often be found standing behind the glass behind their kid, and often recording the game from the goalie-cam like vantage point.
Hershey
Our second tournament of the season takes place in Hershey, Pennsylvania. We have a long history of tournaments in Hershey that include trips to Hershey Park, Chocolate Land, Hershey Bears games, and concussions. This time we make it back to Chocolate Land and on the second night of the tournament Brendan and I meet up with one of his teammates at the Hershey Bears game. The previous season the Bears won the American Hockey League (AHL) championship. The night we attend the Bears raise the banner in front of a capacity crowd.
Hershey has some fun memories, but also some not so fun ones as well. Two years ago, Brendan’s select travel team played in a tournament in Hershey. He stayed with another teammate / family for the weekend. Of course, the one weekend where neither Jill nor I could attend the games turns into the one tournament where Brendan suffers a concussion, spends time in the hospital, and misses the next month of hockey. It’s a topic of conversation for the entire drive to Hershey this time around.
We are more aware of concussions and their near and long-term effect today than in my childhood. Growing up playing multiple sports to include football and hockey, concussions were not on the radar of players, coaches, or parents. Getting knocked on the head was part of the experience, and if one can tell with 60% certainty how many fingers a coach was holding up, they were back in the game. “Walking off” an injury always seemed to be the prescription to cure pain. We have more knowledge today, and our decisions as parents are more informed than previous generations, and I assume our kids will have even greater knowledge to evaluate the risk their kids take in their athletic endeavors. What that concussion did was bring that awareness front and center. By this, I mean every time since I get nervous when Brendan makes any kind of contact with another player. Again, nervousness and anxiety lead to my habit of becoming an unofficial team photographer.
The tournament hosts games in both Hershey and Harrisburg, meaning that the drives to each rink from the hotel can take 20-40 minutes. The delicate times at these tournaments occur when there are 4-6 hours between games. The players arrive to the rink about an hour before game time for warm-ups. Thus, the time between games is just enough time to do nothing. We have time to eat a leisurely lunch, then roll to the rink to the next rink a bit early.
Win win our first game easily 6-2, but lose the next game in sudden death shootout, meaning teams alternate taking shot until one team scores and the other doesn’t on the same turn. The York Devils score on their first shot and make the save. But getting the crucial point for the regulation tie leads to the Whalers eventually taking second in out pool as we then lose a winnable game against Palmyra 4-1. Coming in second means we play the Skyland Kings who finished in first-place team in the other pool, the winner then getting the opportunity to advance to the championship.
There is a saying that once the puck drops, the only sane people in the building are the players on the ice. Hershey provides an example of how parents can be just as passionate about what happens on the ice as their kids, and at times even more passionate. We experience an opposing parent cheer when one of our players is cross-checked from behind and down on the ice. Following the game another parent squirts water at our players from the bleachers while they walk towards the locker room. Kids often take on the emotions of adults that surround them, and in my opinion, we are lucky that there was no further escalation.
Unlike football, the benches of each team are on the same side of the ice. In most arenas that host youth hockey, the bleachers for parents and friends to sit in are on one side. So unlike football, parents of opposing teams often sit close to each other, rather than on opposite sides or ends of the rink. Being in close proximity means overhearing snide or passive aggressive remarks, which in turn leads to loud arguments between parents. Hockey has an ugly history of parents fighting after a game, including with other parents, with coaches, and with referees. I tend to think this is another reason why I spend my time during the game walking around the arena taking photos, it helps me to ignore the rest of the noise.
From the opening faceoff until the clock struck 0, the Whalers control the semi-finals, winning 4-0 over Skyland, setting us up for the final round against the New York Aviators. The Whalers score two early goals, including one by Mason who does what every hockey player is supposed to do…skate to the net and stop at the net. He’s right there to tap in a rebound from Hunter. The Aviators come back with two late goals and the championship game goes to overtime, which is a 3-3 for five minutes, followed by a shootout if no one scores in OT.
Disaster almost strikes with about two minutes left in regulation. Brendan is on the ice for a defensive zone faceoff. The puck comes back cleanly to him and he turns and attempts to rim the puck up to the left side wing. But Brendan is 12 and doesn’t execute the play like a seasoned NHL defenseman. His head is down as he strikes the puck, and the black disc comes flying towards our own goal. Avi, not expecting his own player to shoot the puck at him is not in position to make the save, but fortunately the puck clangs the post. Avi covers the puck, and the referee blows the whistle for another faceoff. Inches save me from what could have been the longest car drive in the history of parenthood.
After the game I talk to Brendan about the play, I show him a video of the Smythe Division Finals from 1986. The Oilers led by Wayne Gretzky, Mark Messier, Paul Coffey, Jari Kurri, and Grany Fuhr a poised to win a third consecutive Staley Cup. The Flames take the Oilers to a game 7 which occurs in Edmonton. The game, like our finals game is 2-2 with about 2 minutes left. Steve Smith, a rookie defenseman has the puck behind the Oilers net and attempts a breakout pass that careens off Fuhr’s skate into the back of their own net. Oiler lose 3-2. No Threepeat. The rest of the story is that the following year when Edmonton wins the cup for the third time in four years, the first person Gretzky hands the cup to is Steve Smith. Smith wins 3 Cups in his 900+ games in the League, and while not a hall of famer, is in the hall of very very good.
Mason’s goal gives the Whalers an early 2-0 lead
Unfortunately, our team takes two penalties in the first minute of overtime, which gives the opposition a 5-3 advantage for nearly a minute and a half. They score quickly after one of their forwards gets into our crease and knocks down our goaltender. It’s an obvious missed goalie interference, and in some ways becomes the excuse for losing what is otherwise a winnable game.
I tend to disagree with the sentiment. Sports, like life, are unpredictable and predicting cause and effect even harder. Had the goal been disallowed, we are still on a two-man disadvantage for another minute, and the chances of the other team scoring would still be high. Throughout the game we took seven other penalties, which limit our offensive chances, and indeed a logic to why the game was 2-2 at the end of regulation time.
One of the hardest moments athletes experience, is losing the final game. It takes extraordinary effort to make it to the Super Bowl, game 7 of the World Series or game 7 of the Stanly Cup. Only one team can win, and the loser is forced to watch the opposing team have medals placed around their necks or raise the championship trophy. You stand at the abyss, eyes staring across the ice, looking into a future that can succumb to hopelessness or rise from the bitterness burning for revenge, and with a greater hunger to win. Second place in Hershey, as respectable as it is, only fuels the team’s hunger for more.
We might be good. 19/20 and 27/27 October
Our early success in Wilmington, Southern Maryland, Charleston, and Hershey comes with a warning about false confidence. We haven’t played any teams in Northern Virginia, and they have a reputation for quality hockey. In general, the hockey community always assumes the further north one goes, the better the hockey will be. This was true 30 or 40 years ago, but I don’t think it’s as true today. Cities like Dallas, Tampa, and Raleigh run terrific hockey programs, expanding the pool of youth hockey players, and in turn raising the level of play at all levels of the game. Indeed, this is a continuation of the process that started with Wayne Gretzky’s trade to the L.A. Kings back in 1988.
There is a direct line from Gretzky’s arrival in Los Angeles to the youth hockey programs and leagues we participated in over the past 4 years. Gretzky’s trade popularized hockey across the United States, gave permission for teams such as the Minnesota North Stars and Hartford Whalers to move to Dallas and Raleigh. New franchises such as Tampa Bay Lighting and the Florida Panthers succeeded in the warm weather state of Florida. These franchises then gave rise to the development of local hockey rinks and programs in the suburbs of Southern cities. This includes many of the locations where we travel for games and tournaments.
The indications of being a good team happen when the Whalers win four consecutive games against Loudoun and Reston, two teams in Northern Virginia. The Loudoun games at our home rink are blowouts, with wins of 9-1 and 7-1. In the second game the coaches mix up some positioning and play looser with the lines, allowing some kids to play positions they normally don’t play. Brendan gets a period of offense, a position he played for the entirety of last season. Given the number of close games the Whalers will play over the next couple of months, the blowout wins are a nice respite.
We win the games at Reston 5 -4 and 9 – 8. The shootout of the second game is a surprise, as the Whalers’ preferred method is to win against good teams by limiting scoring opportunities of the opposition. Both games are fast-paced, and generally at a higher level of play than our previous games. The fact that we won both games, however, gives us a sense of confidence. The Whalers record now stands at 15 - 4, with a first place and second place tournament showing. For all the fear of not competing with teams north of us, it appears this Whalers team is for real.
Another Championship: Pittsburgh 8 – 10 November
On Veterans Day Weekend, the Steel City becomes witness to the 12U AA Whalers continued on-ice success. Givin the performances in Charleston and Hershey, along with regular season wins against D.C. area-based teams, the kids have confidence, and in some ways an expectation of success.
Tournament locations and schedules often leave little time for sightseeing, this tournament becomes an exception to that rule. The schedule allows time for both knee hockey and exploration of Pittsburgh. We make time one evening to take a trek up the Duquesne Incline, and the next day take a stroll through downtown Pittsburgh. We eat at Primanti Brothers, take a selfie at the Mr. Rogers Statue, and walk by the estimated location of the first professional football game ever played. Football history of course is a topic I find fascinating, as it helps explain so much about the American Way of War.
Steel City at night. I took this photo from the top of the Duquesne Incline. A large framed version now hangs in my house
The semi-finals take place on Monday morning, meaning if we lose, we go home and make it back to the house at a reasonable time. If we win, we play in the championship game, and make it back home late in the evening, with work and school waiting for us the next day. Every parent on both teams expresses the angst, you want your kid to win, to come home happy and with a first-place medal around their neck, but also don’t want to risk falling asleep on the drive home. It’s not the last time I will have this conflicted feeling.
In this tournament the Whalers soundly defeat a team from Canada, they beat a team from Mount. Lebanon, they beat local teams from South Hills and South Pittsburgh. The only close game occurs in the semi-finals which we win 3-1. Up 2-1 with less than a minute left, the South Pittsburgh team puts what appears to be a game tying goal into our net, but the referee quickly waves off the goal. The South Pittsburgh player kicked the puck in the net (yes, there was a distinct kicking motion). Moments later Nate closes out the game with an empty net goal and the Whalers on to the finals. Over the long term, life tends to even out. The referees made the right call, and in some ways alleviated the pain of the missed goaltender interference we experienced in Hershey.
The tournament ends with another Whaler win, and the score wasn’t close. When the clock struck zero it was Whalers 9, Allegheny Badgers 3. Everyone tosses their gear in the air, we take a group picture, and the kids skate off the ice. There are no medals for this win, only a baseball cap for the winners and a towels for the runner-up. The third-place team was fired. I tend to believe that for the money invested in each tournament, the winners and runners up should come home with some type of hardware.
For the next two weeks, my son wears his championship hat to school, he wears it around the house, and he wears it when he goes out with his friends after school. He wears it to and from practice, and at the table during breakfast and dinner. Medals go on the rack above his pillow, the hat goes seemingly permanent on his head.
Mid-Season Review
“He who defends everything defends nothing” – Frederik the Great
Just before Thanksgiving the coaches provide each member of the team (and parents) an individual review and assessment of their performance. Brendan gets his feedback, which is similar to our discussions throughout the season, and in many respects previous hockey seasons. I find that it’s important for Brendan to hear feedback from coaches, as informed as my thoughts are, the adage that kids never listen to their parents always holds up. There are astrophysicists and Nobel Award winning mathematicians who hire tutors to teach their kids basic algebra.
My personal and general observations at this point of the season go something like this. The splitting of the ice with the 14U team is critical to both our team’s development and success. Getting 3 x 80-minute practices in lieu of 2 x 80-minute practices per week adds up over long season. I don’t think our team is competitive without getting 1/3 more ice time than other teams. Add in the off-ice time where the team either does strength training or video review has also advanced the player’s awareness and helps in holding the team accountable for various successes and failures.
Extra practice time is not the only reason, the practice design of small area games allows every member of the team to get more puck touches, more passes, more shots, and provides an environment where the players are making more decisions at a faster pace. These practice designs are generally following USA Hockey’s American Development Model (ADM). The proof of ADM’s value lies in USA Hockey’s success in international tournaments (especially at the junior level), and the continues rise in percentage of American players at the professional level.
My second observation is the general tactics that the team applied since pre-season practices. All five players on the ice are aggressive in challenging opponents when they gain possession of the puck. This constant pressure slows the pace of opposition transitions. Moreover, applying this pressure in the offensive zone proves to be an effective defensive strategy. Other teams can’t shoot the puck or score from their side of the ice. There are lapses (and expected lapses at the 12U level) when our defense presses and gets beat at the opponent’s blue line, which allows for a rapid transition and at times odd man rushes to our net. But our defense has generally held their own, and their aggressive play to hold the blue line even leads to goals off turnovers. Opponent defenses tend to get of position when our defense activates from the blue line, as they must account for a new attacker. The backside of the aggressive play is that although the puck tends to remain in the offensive zone, it leads to opponents maintaining five skaters in the same zone, reducing the number of goals we score on transitions or odd man rushes. With the sweet comes the bitter.
According to the great Anatoly Tarasov, there are three speeds to the game; 1) speed of feet, 2) speed of hands, and 3) speed of mind. At my son’s level, I see him gradually getting comfortable with the speed of the game. The game he is playing this year at AA is faster than the A level game he played last year. Moreover, Brendan’s perspective of the game changed with his movement to defense, a position that he didn’t play one shift of last year. To an outsider watching hockey, there is a pace to the game that’s easy to observe. Travel games are faster than house. AA is faster than A, 16U is faster than 12U, the NHL is faster than college hockey. This obvious speed differential changes when you step on the ice, but the fact is that each player on the ice has a different perception of speed. There is a pace that you can see and a pace that you can think, and often the two are not the same. Hockey is hockey at all levels of the game, it just gets faster as you move through life.
The final aspect I credit to success is balance. Our team has balance across three lines. While the first line accounts for most goals, every line in every game has scoring chances, and when the top line could not score, goals came from other places. All too often in youth sports a team’s success relies on one or two players who are levels above their teammates and the competition. One kid scores five or six goals, makes nearly all the baskets, and pitch 1-15 mph faster than anyone else, or has a speed where no defender can keep up with them. Sometimes these kids are generational talent, sometimes they are born early in their birth year group and/or mature faster than their peers. It’s frustrating to compete against teams with this dynamic, as down inside you have the knowledge that you’re not competing against another team, rather you’re competing against just one player on the opposing team.
In any sport, having one dominant player accounts for a team’s success tends to disappear with age. Leaving aside generational talent (Michael Jordan, Connor McDavid, etc..), kids will eventually move to a higher-level league, or have their peers catch up to them. Bigger kids get faster, and smaller kids get stronger. The danger in having an athlete dominate early in their childhood is that they become reliant on one skill of their game and never develop complementary skills to employ when they reach a level where everyone has talent.
14 December: The Gaudiness of the St. James
Mid-December takes us to Alexandria, Virginia to play back-to-back games against the St. James. Both games take place on Saturday, with about 4 hours between the first and second games. We don’t get the chance to play them at home, thus both games are league games.
Pulling up to the St. James complex, I opt out of using the valet parking, drop Brendan and his equipment off at the entrance, and park a half mile away. To understand the previous sentence, one must comprehend the scale of the St. James. It is a large and garish sports complex with a fitness center, multiple indoor soccer and lacrosse fields, dozens of basketball and volleyball courts, and two ice rinks. There is a full restaurant and bar, and various sports shops inside the facility. The St. James represents all that is evil and wrong with the youth sports industrial complex.
In the first game the Whalers look sluggish, perhaps suffering from car legs following the drive up. Halfway through the third period we are down 3-0. Nate scores a power-play goal with 6:20 left in the game, and it’s becomes as if he was the apprentice that brought the brooms to life. Myles scores 16 seconds later, and Nate scores again with 33 seconds to go and an empty net behind him. We walked away with a 3-3 tie and an important point for the league standings. It feels like a win, but the reality is we left a point on a the table against a team we should have beaten cleanly.
The brooms keep dancing later that event as the Whalers jump to a rapid 5-goal lead. The game is never close, The St. James rarely spend time in our zone, and the final score shows an 8-0 win for the Whalers, and the game wasn’t that close. To nearly lose one game and follow-up with a dominant 8-0 performance proves once again why one should never gamble on the outcomes of 12U hockey.
I often credit slow starts like we experienced against the St. James to a condition we generally refer to as “car legs.” Unlike all the teams in the DC area, we have a 3-5 hour ride on Saturday afternoons to play away games in the National Capital Region. Indeed, the ride often includes stopping for fast food or a sandwich at Wawa, not always the best choice for a pre-game meal. Sitting in a car for that long can be detrimental to to early outcomes of games, even with a proper warm-up at the rink.
21 December The Greatest Game Ever Played. Caps Academy
On New Year’s Eve, 1975, as part of the “Super Series,” the Montreal Canadians and the Soviet Red Army played the greatest game in the history of hockey. When the buzzer rang, the scoreboard read 3-3. Yes, the greatest game ever played was a tie. Skating on the ice that evening was a stable of future Hall of Famers from Guy Lafleur, Steve Shutt, Ken Dryden, Yvan Cournoyer, Larry Robinson, and Bob Gainey. The Habs were coached by Scotty Bowman, perhaps the greatest hockey coach of all time. The Soviets had Vladimir Tretiak in goal, and players such as Valeri Kharlamov (perhaps the greatest skater ever not to play in the NHL), Boris Mikhailov, Alexander Maltsev and a slew of other Olympic and World Champion players.
Our team travelled to Arlington to play the Capitals Academy AA team, who reigned atop the league standings. The Whalers struggled to score, as did the Caps, and when the game ended the score was a resounding 2-2 tie. And while professional hockey now has overtime and shootouts in the regular season, youth hockey does not. But similar to the Canadian – Soviet Hockey game in 1975, the weekend game was the best hockey our team played all year. Fast paced, scoring chances for both teams, solid defense and goaltending. A neutral fan in the stands would be entertained at the high level of play.
The 2-2 tie includes Trent scoring an early third period goal and Cole scoring the game tying goal with 72 seconds left on the clock and with the goalie pulled for an extra attacker. This won’t be the last time in the season that we tie a game near the end, nor will it be the only time we have six skaters on the ice, or the opponent pulls their goalie for an extra attacker. It’s a reminder that hockey, like football and basketball, is a situational sport. Power Plays, Penalty Kills, and Extra Attackers are part of the constant flow of the game, and hockey players must know their roles and responsibilities in each scenario. Accordantly, dedicated practice time for these scenarios is essential to the success of a team over the course of a six month season.
“He was teaching us something far more important: how to cope with the two greatest enemies of a well-lived life, fear and failure” - Michael Lewis
The team holds a Christmas party after the Saturday night game. The kids had a secret Santa gift giving resulting in parents learning other kids favorite team or favorite hockey player. I handed out a couple of books to the coaches as a mid-season gift. It’s a short book by Michael Lewis (originally a article in Vogue) titled Coach: Lessons on the Game of Life. Michael Lewis, the author of Moneyball, The Big Short, The Blindside, and other terrific books wrote this as a dedication to his high school baseball coach, who used sports to prepare Michael for what he would face in life.
For Christmas, Brendan gets a new stick from his Grandparents. Brendan is excited to use it and thinks it will help with his hockey development. I remind him that the most effective way to improve his game is through hard work, practice, exercise, eating right, and proper rest and sleep. None of what I say matters, to a 12-year-old, better or more expensive equipment is what does the trick. At some level the placebo effect probably works, and new and better equipment can give a sense of confidence to kid, which can translate to better outcomes. I still give credit to good practice, hard work, and the right habits over the long term. I compare the desire for new equipment to what I often hear in military circles on the desire for new technology. While technology certainly matters, what more important is having the right education and training to properly and creatively employ said technology.
Celebrating the holidays with the 12UAA Whalers
Caps Academy Again 3 – 4 January
Like war, how a hockey game ends is more important than how it begins. Our next games come against the Caps Academy, only at home following the winter break. The Whalers get off to a slow start, are down 3-0 after the first period, and 4-0 after two periods. But like they do all year, the Whalers wake up in the third period and outscore the Caps Academy 5-1 in the final frame, ending the game with another tie 5-5. Our last goal comes with an empty net behind us and 7 seconds showing on the clock. The team skates off the ice feeling good about the tie and having earned another critical point in league standings.
This tie feels like a win. It was Myles who woke the team from its two period slumber, followed by goals from Gavin, Cole, Dalton, and Nate. This sudden burst of goals highlights a strength of the team, anyone can score. Five goals from five different players, rather than being reliant on one superstar to score all the goals.
Later in the season we will learn the value of this goal when we earn the 4th and final playoff position, ahead of the 5th place Montgomery team by one point. Seven seconds is the difference between our season ending in early February and extending to play towards the end of February. Seven seconds is the difference between a month of seemingly meaningless practices and a month of greater intensity to make a run for the championship. Sports are both a game of inches and a game of seconds.
Tie games have a strange effect. Often the team that comes from behind will feel good about their effort, and in this case the Caps Academy team skated off the ice a bit dejected for allowing the final goal so close to the end. Had the roles been reversed, and had Caps Academy scored a last-minute goal to tie the game, the emotions of the players would surely be reversed. But in a time constrained game like hockey, a goal in the first ten seconds counts all the same as a goal in the last ten seconds.
Sooner or later, you get you get another shot. Although our Sunday morning game is another tight game and the Caps once again come out on top. We’re 0-2-2 against the first-place team, but the great thing about sports is that there’s always the next game. The first game becomes a turning point in our confidence against the Caps. In the that third period it seemed like the Whalers found the right key that opened the treasure chest. The team saw something, and that something would appear again a month and a half down the road.
Lake Effect: 17 – 20 January Rochester
Buffalo Wings, Lake Effect Snow and Tim Horton’s coffee and donuts make for a positive anticipation for a drive from Southern Virginia to the shore of Lake Ontario. Rochester is decided upon as a tournament later in the season, and change to a previously scheduled tournament in New Jersey, the theory being we want to play different teams. It’s generally agreed that Rochester will be a test, as teams that come from the land of eternal winter generally produce quality hockey players and teams.
The drive to Rochester is long, our longest of the season to date. It takes over 10 hours when I account for stopping for food, coffee, and gas. The scenery as I look out of my windshield and car windows gradually shifts from flat pavement to Appalachian rolling hills with snow-capped peaks. The temperature steadily drops, as it will do throughout the weekend. As we approach the city, Brendan and I make a stop for dinner composed of buffalo wings and ribs. Brendan tells me the wings are the best he ever had, and I tend to agree. My only disappointment with this part of upstate New York is the lack of Steamed Hams on any menu.
Arriving late Friday night gives us time to kill on Saturday, with the first game occurring at 6PM. About half the team makes the trek to the International Museum of Play, which turns out to be one of the more enjoyable museums we have been to. Over the years of travel sports we have visited the Udvar Hazy Museum, the Airborne Museum, and the National Museum of the Marine Corps. Moreover, we have been lucky enough to stay near some historic battlefields and visit Gettysburg, Manassa/Bull Run, and Vally Forge. There are displays of toys ranging from early 20th Century board games to G.I. Joe action figures, and interactive spaces that allow guests to play 1980s and 1990s arcade and video games. For anyone in generation X, it’s a return to childhood.
Perhaps the best wings I’ve ever had.
I play Space Invaders, Pac-Man, I play Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and run through nearly a dozen tokens like I did when I was a kid. When standing before Contra, without skipping a beat I enter the Kunami code to gain 33 lives. On a daily basis I can’t for the life of me remember what my wife asked me to pick up on the way home from work, but a 35 year old cheat code is engraved into my brain.
We lost our first game 4-1 and tied our second game with the help of a goal in the waning minutes of the third period and we squeaked out a win in the third game with another late goal and after blowing a four-goal lead in the third period. While not the best performance, we are still competitive for a place in the championship game.
Our fourth game is a must win. The game begins at 7AM, but the lake-effect snow fall began at 10 the night before. The ride to the rink is slow and arduous, and when we arrive at the rink the snow-pow has yet to clear the parking lot. and once again we scored in the last two minutes for a 1-goal victory. Winning means another 6 hours in Rochester, so Brendan and I head back to the hotel to relax before the afternoon championship game. I try to warm up from the morning game, but it will be another week before I can feel my feet again. It’s a reminder that hockey is a cold-weather sport, and no matter how many NHL teams play in Florida, Texas, or Arizona, the roots of the game belong to winter. If Dante’s description of the circles of hell is accurate you can skate in the 9th circle where all the sinners are encapsulated in ice. There is absolutely hockey in hell.
I’m nervous about the final. The team played four games at a rapid pace over the course of 2 ½ days. The Whalers have run with 4 defensemen in each game, as the team is missing two players. So, with three lines of offense and only two lines of defense, Brendan and his fellow defenseman are logging massive minutes throughout the tournament. Fatigue can set in after a schedule as intense as that. I think about this facet of the game with a comparison to the 2010 Olympics, the year Sidney Crosby scored the “Golden Goal.” American defensemen such as Brian Rafalski and Ryan Suter were playing nearly half the game, averaging 28-31 minutes per game. The Canadian defensemen such as Chris Pronger averaged about 23 minutes. By overtime of the finals, the American defense was gassed and could not keep up with Iginla and Crosby on the final shift of the tournament.
In the final, we fell behind early but replied with a couple of goals in under 30 seconds for a 2-1 lead. We expand the lead with another two in the second period, and coming onto the ice in the third period the team has a lot of confidence. Hockey is a game of momentum, and our 4-1 third period lead disappears quickly, as the Rochester team nets three goals less than four minutes. With each goal one can see the mounting frustration of the team and the increased confidence of our opponents. The rink is buzzing, as the opposing crowd for the local team is larger just the parents who travelled to Northern New York. Once again, our team will be tested to see if they have the composure and fortitude to recover.
We held off Rochester for the remainder of regulation time and pushed the game into overtime. The 4-4 overtime lasts about thirty seconds before we score to take home another championship banner. Those thirty or so seconds included everyone on the ice touching the puck, and a shot by Myles from the top of the circle through a screen in front of the goalie. The kids throw their sticks in the air, toss their gloves and helmets to the ice, and gather for some team hugs and celebrations. As I walked to the ice to take the team championship photo, I remark to the referee that I had Brendan mark the inside of his gloves with his number, as the team all has the same gloves, which led to a ton of confusion last time they did this. We walked away from the tournament as champions despite a goal differential of 0, a characteristic rarely seen at any level of hockey.
Another Championship for the 12UAA Whalers
We depart Tim Hortons arena for the slog back to Williamsburg. Brendan is wearing his championship trucker hat on his head and his championship medal around his neck. He wears it for the totality of the journey home and falls asleep for the last six hours of the trip, meaning I drive without stopping for 6 hours, a personal record. My lasting review of Rochester is that it’s a small city that makes Utica look like Elmira.
Does “Clutch” Exist?
“Football is a game of Planning, Hockey is a Game of Surprises” -Roy MacGregor
Throughout the season, but especially in Rochester, our team has come back and scored goals in the final minute to either tie or win the game. This facet of our season leads me to thinking about the term clutch.
I don’t believe in it. A professional hockey game is split into three twenty-minute periods (the original game was split into two periods with a halftime, until team owners learned they could sell more concessions with two breaks instead of one). A goal in the first minute counts just as much as a goal in the last minute. While the conditions on the ice might change, such as an extra attacker with the goalie on the bench, putting the puck in at the end is worth the same number of points as a goal any other time in a game. Players who score goals in a 8-3 win don’t get the same credit as scoring a goal in a close game. In a similar way Tom Brady gets tons of credit for all his 4th quarter comebacks, but rarely does anyone bring up games where he went 27 for 30, 335 yards and 4 touchdowns in a lopsided victory. But that performance is more than likely more impressive than the last second touchdown in a closely contested game. “Clutch” is a made-up thing.
While I don’t see clutch as a thing, I do see hockey as the sport that is most player centric, and it’s player centric from youth sports to the National Hockey League. The play on the ice is too fast, too fluid, and too unpredictable for coaches to have much sway in how the game plays out. In the game, coaches can tinker with lines and who is out on the ice, but once out on the ice, the game belongs to the players. Teams with better chemistry and teamwork on the ice can then often outplay teams that have players with better individual skills.
Where hockey coaches at all levels have influence is in building and training the team at practice. Coaches can institute systems and design practices to increase player individual skills and enhance team dynamics. A coaches influence then is reflected in the development of players and the team over the course of a season, and not so much in the performance of single games. Players have good games, players have bad games, but like every other judged performance they ultimately revert to the mean. In the course of a game, youth coaches can influence the temperament of players, calming them down after a rough play or bad decision for example. Effective coaches gradually raise the level of the mean.
1 – 2 February Yorktown
For the first time of the season, we have weekend home games at the Yorktown rink. It’s a bonus for us, as our 60-minute drive to Chesapeake is reduced to 15 minutes. Leading up to these games our Wednesday night practices in Chesapeake moved to Thursday night at Yorktown. Having a rest day between practices is beneficial, even more so as our normal weekday practices often lead to hockey on five consecutive days. The best bonus for us to play at Yorktown is getting home after practice before 10 PM.
The team gathers its thoughts between periods. Coaches remind them of what’s important, influence the temperament of the team, but it’s the players on the ice that have to perform when the puck drops.
Playing at Yorktown was nice, but playing against Ashburn reduced the joy. Ashburn was fast, probably the fastest team we played all season. They pressured the puck, leaving little time for our players to make decisions. We stayed close in the first game, essentially losing by one goal. We scored early on the first shift, but then Ashburn took over and controlled the pace and tempo of the game. The speed and unrelenting pressure lead to breakaways, which turns into goals. The Whalers have stints where we control the play, keep the puck deep in the Ashburn zone, and keep the game competitive. The final score is Ashburn 6, Whalers 4, the final Ashburn goal coming with fewer than five seconds left on the clock.
Ashburn’s strength seems to be that they play a more structured system that highlights the speed and skill of their players. Like the Whalers, their team has a balanced attack where any line can score. In hockey, the best player can’t be on the ice for the totality of the game. Every player needs rest, and the top players might be on the ice for 1/3rd of the game. Ashburn has their top players, but their other lines can score too.
Game two is bizarre and reminds me of why I don’t gamble on 12U hockey. Ashburn switches the narrative and scores on the first shift, jumping to a fast 4-0 lead at the end of the first period. The Whalers regain their composure and score three goals in the first couple minutes of the second period to bring the score to 4-3. We continue to control the game, hitting the post, hitting the crossbar, or just missing the net wide on multiple scoring chances. The game then shifts back to Ashburn in the third period, and they close out the game with five goals for a resounding 9-3 victory. On the bright side, we are still in a “win and in” scenario going into our game next week against Navy.
Pressure 4 February.
“Pressure is something you feel when you don’t know what you’re doing” – Chuck Noll
I played my best hockey when I was 30 years old. I played my best hockey when I didn’t care what anyone else thought about my performance on the ice.
The week of practice after the losses to Ashburn raises the stakes for the next games against Navy vis-à-vis the playoffs. Win and we are in. Should we lose and Montgomery tie or win their game, we are on the outside looking in. This leads to a discussion on pressure in youth hockey that Brendan and I talk about on the ride home from practice. Kids who play youth sports feel stress from multiple places each time they step on the ice, the field, or the court. Kids think about what the coach will say when they come off the ice after a shift, they think about what their parents will say on the car ride home, they think about what their teammates will say after the game and at practice the next week. It’s not just in games where they feel stress, they feel it at practice too. Older kids playing at higher levels bring the stress of hoping a scout sees them playing their best hockey in the short snippet that might be seen. The reason I largely avoid watching practices is so Brendan can tell me about the practice, instead of me lecturing him on what I observed. One less contributing factor to anxiety.
When one thinks about evaluating talent, hockey is one of the most difficult sports to judge an individual’s performance. The concept of plus/minus is useful but never tells the complete story. You can let an opponent skate though you, but your goalie makes a phenomenal save, ensuring you don’t get credit for a minus. You make the perfect pass to a teammate who whiffs on an open net, you don’t get the plus. A player’s point total is often dependent on the talent that surrounds them. Bernie Nichols is one of eight players to score 70 goals in one NHL season, he did with the L.A. Kings skating beside Wayne Gretzky who had 114 assists that same season. Understanding the talent level of a hockey player is something that needs in person viewing.
Further complicating statistics for youth hockey, or any youth team sport is the understanding that at any given time there are 2-3 kids on the ice doing something they shouldn’t be doing, or out of position in a place where they’re not supposed to be.
I played my best hockey in the Landesliga because I didn’t care what others thought. I was in my early 30s living in Germany, so no parents to criticize practice. The coaches were Czech and German, so despite my German speaking abilities, the language was too fast to comprehend during games. I was there for the joy of playing hockey. Don’t ever leave something you love too soon.
Concluding the Regular Season 8 – 9 February. Go Army Whalers. Beat Navy.
Sometimes you give your best, but your best isn’t enough. Our last regular season games are against Navy. We split the last match up, but won the important league game, which rose in importance as time advanced through the season. Last week’s losses to Ashburn put the team in a “win and you’re in” scenario for our Saturday evening game.
The first period includes an early goal from Dalton, and the general feeling is that just like the rest of the season, his goal will be the spark or catalyst to get the team going. It generally does, and for the remainder of the game the Whalers tend to dominate the tempo. We have more shots, more time in their zone, but the one thing e need more of…goals…are hard to come by. The Navy goaltender stands as a brick wall, and with 14 seconds left, Navy scores on an empty net. Final score Navy 3, Whalers 1.
Like our game against the Caps Academy in December, this game was fast paced, clean, and high-quality hockey on the part of both teams. It was entertaining to watch, and even the feedback from the kids after the loss was that it was a fun and competitive game to be a part of. If there is any sense of hockey development, the kids recognize good hockey when they see it, or when they are a part of it.
Opening Faceoff against Navy. The team wearing alternate jerseys thanks to a kind donation.
Sunday morning’s game on Super Bowl Sunday is a mixed bag. It’s a non-league game, and our destiny is in the hands of Ashburn and Montgomery, who play later in the afternoon. If Ashburn wins, we are in the playoffs, if Montgomery wins, they take the 4th seed, and we have a month until Nashville and our next meaningful game. Navy jumps to a fast 3-0 lead after the first period, but the Whalers bounce back and eventually take a 4-3 lead. We then exchange goals and end the game in a 5-5 tie. While not the best hockey of the season, the team once again shows that they don’t quit, and that they play hard until the final buzzer.
When compared to my childhood experience in youth sports, the current youth-sports industrial complex simply blows my mind. After picking up Tropical Smoothie, Brendan begins to monitor the Ashburn – Montgomery game while we drive home. Montgomery gets an early goal, followed by three strait goals from Ashburn, who then hold off long enough for a 3-2 win. The Whalers are playoff bound as the 4 seed, and a first-round game against Caps Academy two weeks down the road. If I were to ask a 12-year-old Dan Sukman how he monitored other games in his youth hockey leagues, the simple answer is we didn’t. There was not way to watch a game in progress unless you were at the rink watching the actual game. League stats and standings were compiled at the rink and posted weekly on the bulletin board. The nicer rinks had typed out pages. The ability to monitor a 12U hockey game in real time on the internet while driving on the highway would be inconceivable to a kid in the 80s and 90s.
So two good news stories from this Sunday, the Whalers are in the playoffs, and the Chiefs get destroyed by the Eagles.
Individual vs Team
The week after our final regular season game the coaches hold a meeting with all the parents to discuss the structure of 14U travel hockey for the next season. Tryouts will happen at the end of April, and there will no longer be a minor and major 14U team. The teams will be mixed (composed of 13- and 14-year-olds) and chosen based on the tryouts by the rink. This aspect offers a chance to reflect on my philosophy of team sports.
There are team sports and there are individual sports and anyone who plays sports at any level, especially team sports like hockey, football, or baseball, understands that the way to win is by playing as a team. However, this is counterbalanced at every level by the individual aspects. Players are judged and recruited as individuals. Players are always competing against teammates for more time on the ice, for a starting position, for a spot on a higher-level team. Players consistently compete to maintain their standing as a starter, on the first line, and on the power-play. At higher levels players in team sports compete for a better contract, they chase individual records, and generational talent are competing against themselves. Every sport is an individual sport.
Playoffs 22 - 23 February
“Life is just a place where we spend time between games.” – Fred Shero
We have a weekend off before the playoffs and use the Saturday off to bring the kids to an escape room in Virginia Beach. It’s a nice way to continue to build the team’s unity an chemistry, and serves as a nice way to break any tension that may be building in the coming week. That week is interrupted by the first significant snowfall to hit the Hampton Roads area in nearly a decade. Our third practice of the week is cancelled, as are three days of school.
Steel sharpens steel. Leading up to the playoffs our team uses the last 15 minutes or so of our Monday and Tuesday practices to scrimmage against the 14U team. It provides an opportunity for our players to skate against bigger and faster players. While coaches teach the game, players also learn from each other. Hockey players, like all athletes learn by observing, they learn by experience, and they learn through competition. The faster pace of these scrimmages means our kids are forced to accelerate and maneuver faster, are forced to react to new situations faster, and think ahead faster. In some ways it’s speeding up the hockey equivalent of John Boyd’s OODA Loop.[i] The advantage in both hockey and war go to the side that can make the right decisions at a faster pace than the adversary.
The playoffs take place at the Ashburn rink, just outside of Dulles Airport. It’s another one of the rinks that’s part of DC, but in reality, a 45-minute drive from downtown. It’s close to the Air and Space Annex I mentioned previously in this journal. There are two ice surfaces, and the rink is considered one of the better facilities in the area and has been so for a long time.
The CBHL playoffs are unique in that there is no consolation game. If we win on Saturday morning against the Caps Academy, we play in the championship on Sunday against the winner of the Ashburn vs Navy game. If we lose, the league season is over. This of course leads to the dilemma of choosing to book a hotel for one night or two (our game is Saturday morning, so Brendan and I book a hotel for Friday night). I book two nights, and it turns out justifiably so.
The first period against the Caps is fast paced hockey with more body contact than usual, and the referees let the game play out. A few minutes into the second period Bella takes an off angle shot and it slides through the opposing goalie and the Whalers are first on the board. A couple of minutes later Nate takes a break-out pass from Trent leading to a break-away and the puck goes into the back of the net. 2-0 Whalers. Following the face-off the Caps turn the puck over in our zone, Trent grabs the puck and turns into 1997 Darren McCarty, skating through the Caps defense. 3-0 Whalers and looking for a spark the Caps switch goalies. The Whalers continue their new found dominance over the Caps and close out the game with two 3rd period goals for a decisive 5-0 victory and trip to the finals. In the last 4 periods of league play, the Whalers outscored the Caps 10-1.
Team chemistry has been central to the Whaler’s success, and later in the evening I see what makes that on-ice chemistry work. At the hotel most of the parents hang in the lobby while the kids generally hang out with each other in the hallways playing knee hockey or in the lobby watching videos on their phones. There are no apparent cliques on the team, nobody appears to be excluded from events. I come to this realization and at the same time I realize Whaler parents have generally all gotten along all season. Unity is a strength of this team.
Teammates embrace after Trent’s phenomenal goal. This team chemistry will be hard to ever recreate
We woke up for the Sunday final excited but nervous. Ashburn beat the Whalers twice earlier in the season, and for the most part the games were not close. The game with the close score had more to do with our team being on the power-play for nearly half the game, and Ashburn scored two short-handed goals. But Saturday’s decisive win over the Caps has the players and parents brimming with confidence.
The puck drops at 9:50, and through the first period the Whalers keep it close. After 15 minutes of play we found ourselves down 1-0. The Whalers start hot in the second period and tie the game, only for Ashburn to take the lead back a couple minutes later. Ashburn scores again on a powerplay, and we are down 3-1. Over the next 6-7 minutes the Whalers control the possession and have multiple scoring chances. We hit the post or the crossbar three times. Other times the puck is laying in the crease only for the Ashburn defense to sweep it away a second before a Whaler stick can get there. We have a 5-3 advantage for 67 seconds but don’t convert.
Ashburn replays the script and pulls away in the third period. Dalton scored early to pull within two goals, and for a moment there is a feeling of that we can come back, but Ashburn proves to have more depth and speed. We matched them for a little over two periods until Ashburn scores three unanswered goals to finish off the contest. When the game is over the Whalers are at the short end of a 7-2 Ashburn victory.
At the end of the CBHL season, I assume that this 12UAA Whalers team is one of the more accomplished and decorated youth hockey teams assembled. In every event we participated in, the team was either a finalist or champion. Champions in Charleston, Finalist in Hershey, Champion in Pittsburg, Champion in Rochester, and Finalist in the CBHL.
This team is the Michael Phelps of 12U Hockey
Epilogue Nashville 6-10 March
Nashville, 6-9 March. What I learned from F. Scott Fitzgerald.
You can’t recreate the past. It’s a valuable lesson I learned from reading The Great Gatsby. Our final tournament of the season takes place in Nashville. Before I start detailing the trip and the hockey, I thought I would dedicate this part of the post to my friend, and long-time member of the Nashville Hockey community, Mike O’Neill.
When I moved to Tennessee in the summer of 2004, one of the first people I met outside the Army was Mike O’Neill. Mike was the team captain/manager for a men’s team at the A-Game Sports Complex, one of the two rinks in the Nashville area. Mike welcomed me to his team, aptly named “Blue” after the blue colored jerseys we wore on the ice. I would skate along side Mike for nearly six years, at both the rink in Franklin and the Centennial rink off West End in Nashville. Mike was a solid defenseman, who could change the course of a game with a well-timed rush up the ice a-la Paul Coffey or a current day Cale Makar. Mike provided leadership to the team and always joined the team for a beer and some wings following the game.
More than being on the ice as a player, Mike also served the local hockey community by serving as a referee. He reffed youth games, he reffed men’s league games, and he was central to building up the hockey community in Nashville. Mike mentored a generation of referees, and his referee experience enabled him to project calmness on the ice in a sport known for passions getting a little out of control. For over 20 years, if you, or your kids played hockey in Nashville, you knew and respected Mike O’Neill.
In 2024 Mike passed away from colon cancer. He had been in recession after previously having undergone treatment, but the cancer came back, and the human body can only fight so many battles. After his passing the Predators took a moment prior to their home opener to recognize Mike and his contributions to the world’s greatest sport.
After each game in the touranment, I ask each referee if they knew Mike. All of them did. The young kids new to refereeing, and the older experienced referees all have a story on the way Mike influenced and mentored them.
Mike is next to me, bottom row on the right. he was captain of our men’s league team, and was instrumental to the rise of hockey in the Nashville area.
Both Jill and I continually preach to our kids and to each other that school is always the priority over sports and other activities, but there are exceptions to every rule. Nashville is the longest drive of the season, slightly exceeding the drive to Rochester. It’s the final tournament of the season; thus we go as a family. We break the drive into two days, departing after the kids got home from school on Wednesday, stopping for the night in Blacksburg, and finishing the drive Thursday morning to arrive in time to attend a Nashville Predators game Thursday night leading into the first game Friday afternoon. Sometimes the first priority takes the second seat.
It’s a joy to walk around downtown Nashville Thursday afternoon and attend a Predators – Kraken game Thursday night. Living in Hampton Roads, most hockey games our kids attend are ECHL or AHL level games, with the occasional Washington Capitals game thrown in the mix. In Nashville the team sits together and watches NHL caliber hockey with players like Steven Stamkos and Filip Forsberg on the ice. Prior to the game some of the kids get to play some street hockey in front of the stadium. The highlight of entertainment is the live band performing a mini-concert between periods. Building and maintaining team chemistry is a never-ending project.
Our first game takes place on Friday afternoon. The team has the chance to sleep in after attending the Predators game on Thursday evening and spending some time in downtown Nashville. The players arrive and warm up in Centennial Park, moving and stretching with the full size replica of the Parthenon behind them. The game is against a team from Memphis, Mississippi, a state not known for producing generational hockey talent. The team can field ten skaters and one goalie and frankly is a team we don’t expect to challenge us. But hockey can resemble war, in that games often go in ways you don’t expect, creating surprising outcomes.
The Whalers come out flat, and it’s as if just prior to game time a hockey vampire snuck into the locker room and sucked out all the hockey skills of the entire team. The River Kings score 20 second in on their very first shot. They score again on their third shot. They score three more times putting the Whalers down 5-0. Carter, Bella, and Dalton help to close the gap, but two more goals leave the Whalers down 7-3 at the end of the first. This proves to be the worst period the Whalers played all year. Rarely has a team scored 7 goals in a game against us, the River Kings did it that in 13 minutes. The second period is scoreless, and in the third period the Whalers outscore the River Kings 3-1, promising, but it’s not enough. At one point the Whalers are within one goal, but all the hockey playing skills still haven’t come back, a late goal by the River Kings results in the scoreboard reading 8-6, the Whalers on the short end.
There is thinking as to how the Whalers could play the way they played. Car legs come to mind, but the team arrived the day before, and the River Kings had their own car ride to deal with too. My experience tells me that the team may have reached what we call in the military their culmination, or limit of advance. Culmination is that point in time and/or space when the operation can no longer maintain momentum. In the offense, the culminating point is when effectively continuing the attack is no longer possible and the force must consider reverting to a defensive posture or attempting an operational pause. A limit of advance is the point where an attack must halt to allow sustainment to catch up with the maneuver element. You can’t continue the attack with no gas left in the tank. I sense that the team’s culmination point may have come with the decisive defeat of Caps Academy two weeks back.
We have a few hours before the start of game 2, and it’s a moment where I try to recreate the past. In January of 2007, I skated in a pick-up hockey game at the same rink where Brendan and his team are playing over the weekend. I expected to meet some friends and hit the clubs downtown following the game. That plan fell though when my friends chose to hang in Clarksville, thus after the game I went for dinner alone, by coincidince, Jill was there eating dinner alone too. We chatted, made plans for a date the next night, and have been together ever since. This weekend I tell Brendan that had I not been playing in a hockey game at Centennial Rink 18-years ago, he would not be playing there today.
Jill, the kids, and I take a ride to the restaurant where we met. It’s under new ownership, with a new name, and new menu, but the physical building is still there. We are able to have a late lunch, and although I was unable to order the same meal as the night I met Jill, we are still able to reminisce about the night we met with our kids. You can talk about the past, but you can’t recreate it.
Game two is against the Alabama Thunder, a team whose rating is a point higher than the Whalers, and a team we expected the most trouble with. The game is hard to judge. The flow and pace of the game is fairly even, but the Whalers simply cannot find the back of the net. The Alabama goalie is sharp, and as it has so often happened is assisted by the steel pipes to his left and right. The Whalers record more shots, and spend plenty of time in the offensive zone, but shot on goal are like popular vote in a presidential election, interesting, but not determinative of the outcome. The Thunder score three in the first, one in the second, and finish off the Whalers with two goals in the third period for a 6-0 win.
Game 2 is filled with emotion, which can be helpful when used the right way, but destructive in the wrong way. Throughout the game there is q growing tension between the coaches and the referees, and mid-way through the third period the Whalers are assessed a bench minor and Chris is asked politely to leave the bench. Towards the final minutes Cole is assessed a misconduct for a hard check against a Thunder player. When the horn sounds at the end, the players line up to shake hands but the referee directs the players to skate off the ice to their locker rooms without the handshake.
In over 40 years of sports this was the first time I had ever seen a referee not allow a handshake at the end. Never, not once, not ever, in youth sports, high school, college, or adult leagues. While I understand the desire to deescalate tensions on the ice, the tensions were between the adults and not the kids. Brendan and some of his teammates, along with some players on the Thunder ignore the referee, skate to the other side and shake hands with each other. One of the proudest moments I’ve had as a hockey parent. The moment youth sports are centered on adults, we’ve lost our way. Leave it to 12-year-old athletes to put adults back on course.
Our first game Saturday is later in the afternoon, offering Jill, Brendan, Sabrina, and I the opportunity to visit the place where we were married in November of 2008. In the morning, we drive to the Opryland Hotel and Resort for brunch with Mark, a former teammate of mine, and his wife. It’s an opportunity to reminisce on our youth, our skating prime, and our times with Mike O’Neill. Jill and I then stroll around the resort to the exact location where we took our vows, and take a family photo, recreating our past by telling our kids 17-year-old tales.
Back to hockey where Saturday offers the team an opportunity to set their game strait after a disappointing first day. We have an afternoon game against the San Jose Jr. Sharks. It’s an important game in that should we win, we will have an easier path towards the championship game. It provides an opportunity to be the 3rd seed and play Mississippi in the semi-finals, rather than play against the stronger Alabama team.
The start to game 3 sees the Whalers continue to struggle scoring goals. We have scoring chances, hit the post, and generally control the game keeping the puck in the offensive zone. It’s not until near the end of the second period when Myles intercepts a Sharks breakout pass in the slot, dances around two Shark defenders, and breaks the Whalers scoreless streak. At the end of the 1st period it’s 1-0 Whalers, the score being closer than it should be. In the second period the Sharks and Whalers exchange goals, Hunter putting the Whalers in front 2-1. The Whalers finally break it open in the third period when Joey, Myles, Cole, and Garrett finish off the Sharks for a 6-1 victory, setting us up for a rematch with the River Kings in the semi-finals.
There is a feeling that the team finally found it’s legs, but once again the first period is filled with chances and opportunities combined with difficulties finishing plays with a goal, leaving the game tied at 0 after one period. About five minutes into the second period, the Whalers finally break out with five goals in less than eight minutes. Nate scores twice, Dalton scores, then Hunter followed by Dalton again. The River Kings put one on the board, but Trent answers, and it’s 6-1 after the second period. Garrett and Dalton score in the third while Avi and Defense shut the River Kings down for a decisive 8-1 win and a place in the finals late Sunday morning.
After falling to Alabama on Friday the team is in a better place having won two in a row and decisively defeating the team we lost to on day 1. Finals tend to be close games, as both teams put it all on the table, and this game is the final game of the hockey season for both teams.
Alabama strikes first with a goal in the first period. It’s a hard goal to watch as Brendan lost his footing, leading to a clear path to the net for the Alabama players. It’s his second shift where this type of play happens, and he sits the rest of the period on the bench. Tough pill to swallow. The silver lining is that at the end of the first, it’s only a 1-0 game, and once again the flow of the game and offensive zone possession time is even. Even more, the Alabama team had fewer true goal scoring chances, while the Whalers have had a few, despite not putting one home.
The Whalers and Alabama exchange goals in the second period. Cole senses an opportunity and skates the puck in the zone, eventually scoring close in on the goalie. But the Alabama team strikes back, their goalie continues to stand on his head, and at the end of the second period, it’s 2-1 Alabama. Brendan is back on the ice for his normal shifts, and his play is improved, so as a parent it’s nice to see coaches continue to provide him the opportunity to redeem himself.
The first five minutes of the third period are back and forth. With about 9 and a half minutes on the clock, Alabama clears the puck into the neutral zone. The puck comes loose, Brendan scoops it up, makes a pass to Gavin at the blue line, who then makes a line to the far post. Gavin protects the puck keeping the Alambama defenders to his backside, charges the net and flips a backhand over the glove of the Alabama goalie. It’s 2-2, and anybody’s hockey game.
Brendan, who made the pass to Gavin turned around to skate to the bench for a change then had his back turned to the play, never saw the fruits of his play. Brendan made the most of his opportunity on ice, redemption is a hell of a thing.
Gavin and Dalton celebrate after the game tying goal. Sports tend to bring out the best emotions of athletes.
Tensions are tight, and there is a sense that whoever scores the next goal will win the game. Avi makes some saves, the Alabama goalies make some saves, then with four minutes left there a scramble for the puck in front of the Thunder net, Nate finds the buck and slams it into the back of the net, and for the first time in six periods of hockey, the Whalers have the lead over the Thunder.
Conquest, War, Famine, and Death. With 2:30 left on the clock, the Whalers take a penalty, so for the next 1:30 the Whalers will be down a player. I look at the ice, and in my head, I think being down a player at this point works to our advantage. Our top skaters go out to kill the penalty, and our 4 on the ice are faster and more aggressive than the 5 Alabama skaters. With the game on the line, the Whalers send out the four horseman to ride to victory.
Hockey is about risk and opportunity. As time begins to run out, teams tend to panic and take unnecessary risk. This plays out when Alabama possesses the puck in our zone. The puck is moved well to their defenseman who perhaps having a sense of urgency fires a shot from the point strait into the shin pads of our defenders. The puck falls to Cole’s stick, and Cole ladles the puck into the neutral zone, the perfect open ice pass to Nate. Death rides a pale horse, but Nate who sensed the opportunity rode on his skates past the defense and was off to the races. As Nate approaches the goal, for what might be the first time all year, he refuses to shoot and instead makes a deke and flips a backhand into the back of the net. Conquest! It’s 4-2 with a minute left, and I make my way with my camera to the bench to take shots of the championship celebration.
My thoughts on the final two games of the season. Simple adjustments can change a hockey game. In the semi-finals and finals, the coaches moved Bella from offense to defense. The result of this move was additional ice time, plus the opportunity for arguably our best skater to be on the ice with the top scoring line. Being back on defense meant smooth transitions from the defensive zone to the offensive zone, and significantly fewer quality scoring chances for our opponents. Moreover, this change gave offensive players more freedom to take risk with an underlying knowledge that the defense was secure should the opposing team initiate a transition.
Ice time is not the simple math equation of splitting the total minutes of a game between three lines. In his recent book, Iron Mike: My Time Behind the Bench, legendary but toxic coach Mike Keenan explains how hockey works. In youth hockey with periods of 15 minutes, there are 45 minutes in a game. What this means for the coach is looking at positions, and the number of minutes for the positions, and splitting it in that manner. For example, there are 2 defense positions, which means splitting 90 minutes of time (2 x 45) between 5 players. For forwards, there are three positions (RW-C-LW), meaning the coach must split 135 minutes between 9 players. Coaches must be proficient in hockey math.
Celebrating their final championship of the year. It’s always nice to end the season with a victory.
The players line up to receive their medals, Nate is awarded MVP of the tournament, and Coach Chris receives a mini-Stanly Cup to take back to the rink. It’s a celebration on the ice, and the kids seem to want to stay on the ice longer than usual. It’s the last game of the season, and both parents and kids know what lies ahead.
Death, Taxes, and Change are the three constants in this life. Death comes at the end, taxes every April 15th, and change is happening all the time. For the kids, not everyone will be on the same team next year. We live in a large military community meaning some families move in and out of the area, joining and leaving the Whalers organization. As kids move to 14U, they may be split into different teams based on size, maturity, and skill (a combination of the three). Brendan was new to the team this year, his third team in three years having started with the Prowl, then the Warriors organization, and the Whalers this season. You can’t recreate the past, next year’s team will be different.
Brendan asks me which team he might play for; I tell him the simple truth that it doesn’t matter. If you make the AA team it doesn’t mean you will continue to make it in the future, so continue to work hard and develop. If you play A next year, you will continue to work hard and develop to play AA the following year. Kids grow and mature at different rates, some kids are born in January, others in November, and at the 12U and 14U levels it makes a large difference. Nobody peaks at 13.
For parents, each new season means making new friends. My kids often asked me who my “best friend” is, and my reply is that once you turn 40, you hang out with the parents of your kid’s friends. Every year of my kids youth sports means making new friends, getting a sense of the personality of new parents. Indeed, while kids play knee hockey in hotel hallways, parents are conversing in the lobby, and every year you hope to avoid personality conflicts. It will be hard to match the chemistry parents had within this team.
The past you can recreate is winning. Although each game, season, and tournament is different, the goal is the same. To walk away from the last game as a winner. Winning the Music City Shootout caps off a season where the Whalers were either a champion or finalist in every event they participated in.
Final record: 32-16-6
CBHL 12AA National Finalists
Charleston Cup Champions
Hershey My Hockey Finalists
Pittsburgh Salute to Service Champions
Rochester Empire State Tournament Champions
Nashville Country Shootout Champions
[i] OODA: Observe, Orient, Decide, Act
